"But you, you've gone too far this time. 

You have neither reason nor rhyme with which

 to take this soul that is so rightfully mine."

-Mumford & Sons

Cool crisp air on Fall mornings tends to open my heart and mind just a little more every time I inhale. Letting go, during this time of year especially, has been tremendously helpful to my happiness. It's also allowing me to see the beauty in the things that are right in front of my face; most of all, letting go has allowed me to realize a little more of my self-value.

This soul is rightfully mine, given to me by the unseen, and no one should every be given the ability to control it. Yet, I was giving free-reign of it to the people who I was angry with. Obviously, I'm not little miss sweetie, lol. I still am slightly rude, but I will get there, slowly. 

Lifestyle changes, not changes that last a New York Minute.

xoxo


P.S. 
I bought leather pants yesterday. XD

Waking up

The cool air seems to make my mornings much better than the muggy summer heat, but it has the opposite effect on my heart.

While I'm not longing for A, I'm longing to not be alone. Waking up next to nothing makes me feel empty; seeing a picture of them together waking up makes me feel even emptier. And, it's hard to explain... While I don't care that they are together, it still feels like a slap in the face, and I also feel a slight bit of animosity towards their situation. I nearly sent her videos of us and pictures of us from Saturday night, but it's not even worth it.

Thank goodness for my best friends, though. K is coming over tomorrow for a girls day, and I'm going to her house after The Walk on Wednesday. C may come over tomorrow as well. Hair and face masks... joy.

J looked really cute today at work, my best friend's--C--brother, lol. We have amazing chemistry, and although I am not usually physically attracted to him, my heart beats hard for his personality. He's just calm. And sweet. And funny. Three things I haven't been around in a while with a man. We're just friends, for the most part, but he has slipped in a few kisses lately. He kisses so gently, and he hugs me so strong. Two things A has always failed to do.

And, as I type that, A starts blowing my phone up and calling me.

Sometimes I wonder if I will ever get away.

Xoxo