Here's the deal

Maybe it really just isn't all cracked up to be, or maybe I just cannot be satisfied with the beauty around me. I never want to settle, but I am desperate to grow roots. What do I love about being in Knoxville? I have places and faces that are mine. I have people who know my nickname is Maroo, and I have family who means everything to me.

But, I have that in New York, too, so I don't get what the problem is. I know I need to meet new people, but I cannot exactly understand how. I know I am a difficult person, and I know I don't exactly put off the 'bff' vibe when I first meet people. There still has to be a way though.

Maybe, I just need a place I love to live in--apartment I mean. Some place to call my home, not someone else's.

Today, I have an interview for a second job as a personal trainer. So, maybe the extra money will help me make it through the days and somehow get a place and somehow meet people. I know it takes a long time, especially up here. I know I have an uphill battle with not only myself, but with the people who surround me. This is their world, and I have just stumbled into it.

As for matters of the heart, we all know what is going on with those when it comes to me.

Drops of Jupiter.

xoxo

I've been slacking.

I am officially a New Yorker. I am also officially an employee of Scott J. Aveda... not a nanny--lolz.

I don't really know what to write, because I feel as if I cannot properly express myself on the internet anymore, but it's probably some stupid phase that I am going through.

xx